Follow the 90/10 rule

Now tell me, who doesn't know Stephen Covey? I am sure those of you who often read about self improvement and motivational books know who he is. He's the writer of the best-selling book, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. Does that ring any bell? Click here to go to his official website.

So, I stumbled upon this blog (Forwarded Messages) and found this really inspiring article about 90/10 rule from Stephen Covey. It tells us about things that happened to us most of the time were created by ourselves. It's not really right to blame other people when things were not in our way. Why? Because it is our reaction that can have the biggest affect and impact about the whole situation. Read the description and the example below. It is so useful and believe me that it will bring you new insight to your life.

WHAT IS THIS PRINCIPLE?

10% of life is made up of what happens to you...

90% of life is decided by how you react.

WHAT THAT THIS MEAN?

We really have NO control over the 10% of what happens to us.

The 90% is different. YOU determine the 90%

HOW?
By your reaction

You cannot control a red light. However, you can control your reaction. Do not let people fool you. YOU can control how you react. Let's see this example:

You are having breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. YOU HAVE NO CONTROL over what has just happened. What happens next will be determined by HOW YOU REACT.

...

You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your wife and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows.

You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish her breakfast and getting ready to go to school. She misses the bus.

Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles per hour in a 30 mph speed limit zone. After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60.00 traffic fine away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye.

After arriving the office 20 minutes late, you realize your forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to coming home. When you arrive home, you find a small wedge in your relationship with your wife and daughter.

Why?

Because of how you reacted in the morning.

Why did you have a bad day?

A) Did the coffee cause it?

B) Did your daughter cause it?

C) Did the policeman cause it?

D) Did you cause it?

The answer is: D

You had NO CONTROL over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day!

--- Here is what could have and should have happened ---

Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say: "It's okay, honey, you just need to be more careful next time."

Grabbing a towel, you go upstairs and change your shirt. You grab your briefcase, and come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff.

...

Notice the difference?

Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different.

WHY?

Because of how you reacted.

You really have no control over 10% of what happens in your life. The other 90% was determined by your reaction.

(source from here - creation image from flickr, coffee image from flickr, last image from here)